Election 2008: The Winners
We thought about adding John McCain to the Winners list, as his loss on Tuesday assured that he won’t have the unenviable task of fixing the colossal clusterf@&% left behind by the Bush administration. But then we’d have to add Barack Obama to the Losers list (congratulations bub, it’s your problem now), and that just [...]
Read More »Election 2008: The Losers
As the political season comes to a close and we turn our attentions back to our neglected jobs, friends, spouses and significant others, we thought we’d take the time to look back at some of the winners and losers of the 2008 election. So without further ado, and because we don’t want to keep them [...]
Read More »President-elect Obama Faces Challenge of a “Planet in Peril”
WASHINGTON, DC, November 5, 2008 (ENS) – In a landslide, Americans Tuesday elected Barack Obama as the first African-American president in the nation’s history. The Democratic senator from Illinois won 338 electoral college votes – far beyond the 270 needed to win election to the White House. With 81% of all precincts nationwide reporting, votes [...]
Read More »Victory Dance
The problem with historic moments such as this is that they are so awe-inspiring, so humbling, that it’s easy to be confused by the jubilation that should come with such events. Any outburst of elation or feelings of personal satisfaction that the contest went your side’s way feel almost out of place. Showboating in the [...]
Read More »Virginia is for Levers
Polls just closed in Virginia, but this is not the end to what we’ll be hearing about this state. The get-out-the-vote slogan here should have been “Rock the Vote (but not too much!)” Polls were not prepared for high voter turnout in the state this election. Voting machines broke down in northern Virginia (but that’s [...]
Read More »Election Day: Just Bring It
This is where the rubber meets the road. After the dizzying drama of the last 12 months – John McCain’s campaign left for dead in the early primaries before pulling off the comeback; the epic struggle between the two historic candidacies of Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama – we are hours away from the thrilling [...]
Read More »Bush, Cheney Ruin One Last Election (for McCain)
As we enter the final 24 hours before finding out who will inherit the cataclysmic mess they left behind, let us pause to reflect on the two men that have so significantly shaped the electorate and, indeed, the country as a whole: George W. Bush and Dick Cheney. First, we must find George W. Bush [...]
Read More »Obama’s Family Skeletons
Aarrgggghhh! Murphy’s Law has struck again. Here we are in the home stretch of this historic election, four days from the finish line when every narrative of the last 10 months is reaching a high-pitched whine, and my most crucial research tool is on the fritz. This is seriously vexing. I’m talking, of course, about [...]
Read More »…And Starring Barrack Obama as Muhammad Ali
It was 34 years ago today that Muhammad Ali met World Heavyweight Champion George Foreman in the classic “Rumble in the Jungle.” In the suffocating Zaire heat, Ali had a plan for his bigger, harder-punching opponent – get hit. Repeatedly. While not generally considered a sound strategy in boxing, Ali lay against the ropes, covered [...]
Read More »76 U.S. Nobel Laureates in Science Endorse Obama for President
WASHINGTON, DC, October 29, 2008 (ENS) – In an open letter to the American people released Tuesday, 76 American Nobel Laureates in science endorsed Democratic Senator Barack Obama of Illinois for president of the United States. This is the largest number of Nobel prize winners ever to endorse a candidate for office. Presidential candidate Senator [...]
Read More »Palin 2012
After Nov. 4, whether John McCain wins or loses, the Republican party is going to go into the next room, close the door and give itself a good talking to [www.politico.com]. Party apparatchiks, conservative leaders, activists and think-tank know-it-alls alike will gather and determine “whither conservatism?” and “who gets to drive?” George W. Bush slinks [...]
Read More »…Featuring John McCain as Rich Kotite
When trying to predict what a presidential candidate’s administration would look like, it’s instructive to look to the campaign. The people the candidate hires and the strength of the campaign’s message are vital clues to how they would perform in the Oval Office. An effective campaign staff and clear, consistent messaging can often indicate a [...]
Read More »Evangelical Christians for Obama
A new pro-Obama ads to come from an organization outside of the campaign reads on a white and blue flyer: For I was hungry, and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty, and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger, and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you [...]
Read More »McCain Campaign Issues APB for “Rogue” Palin
The campaign of John McCain, in conjunction with the Republican National Committee, has issued an All Points Bulletin for vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin. Republicans nationwide are alerted to be on the lookout for this rogue politician who is suspected of brutally assaulting John McCain’s presidential aspirations [dyn.politico.com]. Should those aspirations die within the next [...]
Read More »Eleventh-Hour Name Calling
Dave the Dentist, Tito the Builder, Joe the Florist, Phil the Bricklayer and Pam the Republican Teacher are just a few of the characters John McCain has met in his own great schlep through Central Florida the critical battleground states of Ohio and Florida. While Sarah Palin is running around spouting keywords like “terrorist” and [...]
Read More »Elitists Anonymous
……Uh, hel…..ahem, excuse me………Hello. My name is Michael, and I’m an elitist. I want to thank you all for welcoming me here to EA. I’m not sure how long I’ve been an elitist. I was born and raised in small town, so certainly not my whole life. But I’ve lived in New York City for [...]
Read More »Men and the Big P, Women and the Big O
When John McCain’s campaign picked Sarah Palin to be the veteran Senator’s running mate, they hoped this move would snatch up votes from women—primarily white, working class women—from Barack Obama. From the outset, the campaign has tried to brand Palin as the hockey mom next door. She’s a working mother of five. She began her [...]
Read More »Al Qaeda Wants to Party with McCain
One of the more annoying myths in the Republican lexicon was the claim that “al Qaeda wants the Democrats to win so they’ll surrender.” The meme first showed up in the 2002 mid-term election and peaked in 2004 with the bin Laden “October Surprise” video, before being met with diminishing returns in 2006. At its [...]
Read More »People Who Live in Seven (or so) Houses Shouldn’t Throw Roses
so•cial•ism [www.merriam-webster.com] sÅ-shÉ™-li-zÉ™m, noun, 1837 1. any of various economic and political theories advocating collective or governmental ownership and administration of the means of production and distribution of goods 2. a) a system of society or group living in which there is no private property b) a system or condition of society in which the [...]
Read More »McCain Campaign Puts Wright Back on the Table
The McCain campaign has officially run out of ideas. One week ago [www.politico.com]: Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin and several top campaign officials see a sharp attack on Wright as the best — and perhaps last — chance to rattle Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill. ) and force voters to rethink their support of him. But McCain [...]
Read More »Palin Gets Hot on Gay Marriage Ban
Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. That’s the complaint of religious conservatives when it comes to protecting America from the scourge of the Gay Agenda (National Hair Care! Ban on Stretch Pants!. Republicans always talk a good game about taking away the rights of gay people, but they never deliver. As with Roe v Wade, [...]
Read More »Colin Powell on Meet the Press
The image of Colin Powell that I have had seared in my mind for the past several years is that of him at the UN, his voice and body exuding apprehension. He was not confident about his recommendation to go to war with Iraq in 2002, and in his decision, I lost confidence in him. [...]
Read More »“My Kid Has More Chromosomes Than Your Kid”
The bumper sticker on Sarah and Todd Palin’s car reads [voices.washingtonpost.com]: “My kid has more chromosomes than your kid.” Nana-nana-poo-poo! Palin mentions her infant son, Trig, who has Downs syndrome at every stump speech she makes. (But of course there’s no mention of her pregnant teenage daughter, because that is simply inappropriate and out of [...]
Read More »Obama Warns Supporters: “Don’t Get Cocky”
Feeling good, Obama supporters? That was a pretty good debate run Barack had. Conventional wisdom was that he bested John McCain in three straight, with undecided voters declaring him the victor in each one. Obama’s got the ‘Big Mo’ now. The Republican party is a discredited mess, and with the economy being what it is, [...]
Read More »Final Debate Gives “Joe the Plumber” 15 Minutes of Fame
After watching last night’s debate, I was reminded of the prophetic words of Andy Warhol. “In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes.” Well, congratulations Joe “the Plumber” Wurzelbacher, you’re famous, whether you should be or not. Joe is also, apparently, the most important man in America, judging from the attention paid to [...]
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