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Finally! An ad for a cleaning product that doesn’t feature a woman going into an orgasmic paroxysm over a new mop. Only on Madison Avenue does doing the chores turn a woman on. Sure, Pine-Sol may have shamelessly ripped off the Porn for Women books with their new ad, but we don’t care.
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If you suspected a few members of the Justice League of America were gay (hello, Aquaman?) and always wished they’d come out of the closet, there’s now a new ALL-gay superhero comic just for you. It’s called Spandex. What it lacks in artistic skill (visually speaking, this ain’t no DC Comic), it makes up for in fabulous gay pride. There’s “Liberty (glamorous transvestite superhero), Diva (a lesbian Wonder Woman), Prowler (absorbs the abilities of gay people), Glitter (male Dazzler), Indigo (beautiful French teleporter), and Mr Muscles & Butch (strong twins)” (see above). We would have thought there’d be at least one big buff or bearded super dude and one super butch without cleavage, but that’s just us (and we’re neither gay nor comic-book readers, so what do we know?). It’s available from the U.K. but you can download a pdf of the first 40-page comic in the series via Paypal here. More excerpts after the jump.
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We weren’t sure how or why the sex symbol with diarrhea of the mouth, Megan Fox, got an entire cover article dedicated to her in the New York Times Sunday magazine. Is she really such a cultural force? She’s been in like a whopping two movies (we’re counting TRANSFORMERS I and II as one)! Well, we guess a billion Google searches can’t be wrong. We weren’t expecting to be riveted by the article, but surprisingly there was a ton of fascinating stuff on sex and gender roles — and not just out of skilled profiler Lynn Hirschberg’s mouth. Here are some of the best bits (in case you just can’t bring yourself to read a prettied up version of an US Weekly article):
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Consumer Reports recently tested a whopping 15,000 condoms (bought by one dude!) representing 20 models. Alas, there was no actual-use testing done in the lab on the slab, just the boring scientific stuff: packaging examination, stretching, measuring, filling them with liquid to check for leaks, and inflating them with air to the size of 5-gallon water jugs to check for strength until they popped! Wait, who said science was boring? (Check out the video above to see how they do it — try to ignore the cheesy wink-wink-nudge-nudge commentary.) Seven out of the twenty got a perfect score — they include one Durex, two Lifestyles, and four Trojan models — but to get the specific models and their exact ratings you have to be a subscriber. Damn you, Consumer Reports! But a little birdie told us that one of the best ones (receiving a perfect score in strength, reliability and leakage) was Trojan Her Pleasure Ecstasy and one of the worst ones (for strength and leakage) was the Night Light glow-in-the-dark model (though it definitely would give wearers the chance to recreate that awesome scene from Skin Deep).
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1952 DC comic book panel via Hilobrow
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There’s been a lot of self-congratulatory back-patting around the House’s passing of the Health Reform Bill this past Saturday — but it’s come at a huge price. The Democratic Congress pretty much abandoned women’s reproductive rights by including the last-minute Stupak-Pitts Amendment to appease some religio-conservative members of Congress, including several male conservative Dems. Don’t be fooled: it’s not just simply ensuring that there will be no federal funding for abortion care (which was already in the bill) — it goes much further. According to Reproductive Health Reality Check:
Abortion is a safe and legal medical procedure that’s currently covered by 87 percent of employer plans and that one in three women will go through in their lifetime. This bill, passed with pressure from the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops (hello, separation of church and state?), will unfairly take away this necessary coverage and financially penalize women. We should be able to get health reform with a public option without throwing women under the bus — and we can do this if we speak up. Please call on Senate Leader Harry Reid to stop this abortion-care ban.
For a lot more important information on how dangerous and destructive this amendment is, check out these resources:
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Australia kicked off its first ever Sexual Health Week yesterday (running through the 15th) to promote condoms, STI tests, birth control, etc. (To paraphrase Paul Hogan, now that’s a fight!) As part of the project, a survey was conducted showing that nearly all adult Australians taking part in the study have had unprotected sex, but only about half of them have had a test for sexually transmitted infections. We’re sure American numbers aren’t much better. It’s been a while since the ’80s AIDS scare and we’ve gotten lazy with the latex. So let’s take a minute to review Sexual Health Week’s goals and messages, for they are important and inspiring and should not be forgotten, no matter where you are in the world.
GOALS:
MESSAGES:
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Some people have been questioning Rihanna’s choice to wait to talk about her domestic abuse right until the release of her new album. But that’s just the way the magazine-TV-PR-celebrity-promotional circle jerk works: celebrities don’t tend to chat to magazine writers or TV presenters just because they feel like it, they do it because they are contractually required to promote something. And magazines, TV shows, et al are more than happy to comply, because celebrity cover stories sell like hotcakes.
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There’s a reason why Truth or Dare is mostly played by high school kids — because they’re the only ones who are willing to spend hours coming up with creative truths or dares to get their peers more naked, either figuratively or literally. After a hard day at work — or, worse, after a hard day of trolling the help wanted ads in the middle of a recession — who can be bothered to be that creative? Especially when the sex is a sure thing.
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Infomercial parodies are a fine art that only a few have mastered. But we think YourTango has just joined the ranks of elite spoofers with their “SpatSolver.” We guarantee you’ll be wishing this thing was real in seconds! Yeah, the commercial goes on a little too long, and the free “Apologizer” is pretty unfunny, but the site itself is impressively authentic looking and the bit about wearing the SpatSolver as a fashion accessory is Bumpits genius.
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